Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Soul to squeeze

Hi, hope you're all having a great week. Last week of school for me, hurrah! Can't wait to live at the library alone without friends and survive off of strawberry and mango Hi-Chew until January 9! It is very sweet indeed!

I'd like to talk about something that's been on my mind for a while, I have posted about on Twitter and talked about it more in depth on Tumblr, but I will write about it on here too. Again, no surprise, it's about DEPRESSION and emotions. Gah, I'm sorry, just skip down to the photos if you'd like, but again this is my blog and I can post what I want so I shall now start my little rant/theory/thoughts, ha.

I have a friend who's name I'd rather not mention, but her mother has just passed away. And it out of nowhere, no disease, no warning. This, it breaks my heart into pieces. I as a person am already sort of broken inside, but I try so hard to be happy, and I've definitely succeeded in these past few weeks! When I hear things like this it makes me realize that I am at the height of arrogance for getting angry or sad at someone because they hurt me. It's ridiculous. I am ridiculous. I am consumed with feelings of loneliness and I can't help it but I have a home, a family, a business. Not many friends, but I can deal. I had one best friend who I've lost but shit happens. Without trust there's nothing, right? Or are all those corny Twitters and Tumblrs just bullshitting me? It just sucks man. I would be devastated if my mother were to pass.

Please please be happy, do it for me. I will be happy for myself, I will no longer be sad, I will continue to be happy as I am and have been. I had a vivid dream a few nights ago about my life almost being snatched away from me without any warning and I wasn't able to say goodbye to anyone I knew or tell others how I really felt. Nothing. I had nothing and I left. It was terrible. Ever since I had that dream, I've learned that attitude is so important in life. You're thrown into situations right? Like ultimatums and consequences. You don't have a choice for those, but you do have a choice on what kind of attitude you'd have for that day, week, minute, second. Be wise, choose carefully between the two because it could make the difference for you and those wonderful beings surrounding you. Okay I'm done. This has just affected me so much I couldn't help it.

Seriously though, be happy :)
Try to mend all the holes in your life, it's NEVER too late. I hope that didn't ruin your day haha so with that being said, have a wonderful day!!!!!!!

Lavender velvet dress Miracle Eye
Net kimono - DIY
Silver platforms (which I later found out were JC knock offs!!!!) - $25 from eBay
Yin yang earrings and velvet choker - Etsy
Silver cross ear cuffMiracle Eye


Strawberry Freckleface said...

So sorry about your friends mom - that's very sad. ;-( That is one of my biggest fears.

You look amazing though! Seriously LOVE this. You are probably the most stylish teen I've never met.

Laura said...

yay for holidays! You outfit is awesome! I love the hair rolls, I was thinking the other day I can't wait til my hair is long again so I can do them! It is cool you want to spend loads of time at the library, as a complete book addict and future librarian, that really warms my heart!!!

I know what you mean, it can be hard to be happy sometimes and you have to try and focus on the good things instead of the bad. galadarling.com has been an inspiration to me, check out her page.

Condolences to your friend, that happened to one of my friends in high school, the sudden illness and death of mother. I can't imagine how devastating it must have been. I guess that is why we have to live every day to be happy and cherish those that we have.

Daniel said...

A big hug to your friend and to you dear! :(
Awesome and fab as usual ! The shoes look great!

Anonymous said...

Oh man, that's such sad news.

I know what you're talking about, I had a disease that causes 20% of young adult sudden death two years ago. It's when a virus attacks your heart and causes almost identical symptoms to a heart attack... you seriously look at life so differently when things like that happen.

I try not to let things phase me now because at the end of the day, not much of it is going to matter when your time comes. You just have to go through life appreciating what you have and trying to be happy. It's hard not to worry about the bullshit but everyone should try because literally, nothing matters when we're about to leave this place.

Anyway, I thought your shoes WERE JCs. And, I looove that lavender dress, may have to get one for myself.

Claudia said...

where can I get miracle eye? i'm seriously loving it!

hugs and kisses, be happy!

Anonymous said...

I am sorry to hear about your friend's mom. I can't even imagine what she must be going through. <3
I will do my best to be happy for you! I always forget that I have so much to be happy about.
This outfit is just bitchin' from head to toe. Those shoes! What a steal. I also love the long kimono thing. You are amazing.

MolDiva said...

Such a cute blog so thought i'd follow,your style is amazing! Take a look or maybe follow mine:



Cylia said...

hey sweetie! you're wonderful as it is:) and more awesome than you think! hope you're feeling a bit better this week.

mouse said...

hey pretty. virtual hugs. xo

Cindy said...

Holaaa! WOW :O me encantaaa tu blog , es genial, enserio :) TE SIGO DESDE YAAAAAAAAAAA espero que tu tambien te pases por el mio, te lo agradeceria muchisimo ;) un besazo enorme y sigue así con el blogggg!


Cindy K.

Jackie said...

I am sad to read about your friend's mom. Keep your head up and stay positive.

I am loving your Stingers. You wear them well.


ams said...

OMG!!!!!!!!!! you look absolutely amazing and I'm SOO in love with the platform, I want them right now. You've got absolutely amazing sense of style, love it! Great girl <3

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Jen said...

love your sense of style!

J x